InsaneJournal

He's pretty laid back and kind of zen. Despite the enormous pressure of running everything in existence, he spends his leisure time wisely; surfing, eating pizza, watching James Bond movies, playing skeeball, making elaborate sand castles, saving the humans of Earth from killing themselves with the proton accelerator. The only thing that really annoys him is when people claim they're doing his work, die, and then proceed to try and suck up and follow him around in heaven. It's just creepy and he doesn't want people doing it. God also just wishes everyone would listen to him the first time he says something like; "No dude, no eating from the tree. No joke." or "You're going to categorize this in the fiction section right? Because I so made half that stuff up.. Wouldn't it be rad if it really happened?" His deepest, most horrible regret.... was getting rid of the dinosaurs. It's still a very sore subject for Him and he'd rather not talk about it.

FAMILY: Jesus (son), Ted (cousin)
FRIENDS: Gabriel, The Pope, Ghandi, Steve Irwin, John Lennon
ACQUAINTENCES: George Lucas, Zack Snyder, Bill Nye, John Constantine, Dean Winchester, everyone at Woodstock
ENEMIES: Lucifer
EX's: Janis Joplin
CRUSHES: None

In the beginning, God was bored. And thus, out of his almighty boredom - life was created. At first, in his test run, he created the dinosaurs out of the image of his cousin, Ted. They didn't really work out so he threw the Death Star at the Earth.

Take two. He created everything, again, this time leaving out the dinosaurs. On the first day He created light and soup, and jam, and potatoes, and fish, and haircuts and arguments, and jam - more jam - and soot and flies and sleds and showers and old people, and... Belgium. The second day he created fire and water, and eggnog and radiators and things that go "whoosh." On the third day he couldn't remember what he invented, and was pretty tired, so he just slept. Finally on the seventh day, he was so rushed and stressed that he created everything, and then some. On the eighth day, he rested, ninth day, rested again because hey - he just created a world. Again.

Actually he rested from then on. Fourteenth day he smoked all the marijuana in the world, just to test the first batch. Then on the three hundred and ninth day he woke up again to find he his voice mail box was full.

But then things happened, Lucifer fell during a game of red-rover, and Cain killed Abel - centuries later God changed his mind and sent a flood to kill everything and start again. This would later be referred to as the etch-a-sketch method.

Noah was a trip - He told him to build an Arc to save two of each creature but all Noah wanted to do was finish his speed boat. In fact Noah kept pressing on about using the speed boat instead. And while the speed boat was pretty radical and no doubt would give great photos for the Bible, God wanted an Arc. He finally got Noah to agree when he said Noah could add a big engine to the Arc.

His favorite joke on humanity has got to be puberty. At a point in time when they first notice the sex they prefer, they want to look their best - so naturally he made it so they look their absolute worst. And he thinks the voice thing is funny.

After that he sent his son down to Earth to get him to die. Then he had to deal with Moses, the stalker who tried to find him by leading people through the desert for forty days.... With no map.

Pretty much after that God put his feet up, grabbed a pizza, and watched As The World Turns, literally, in high-definition.

God's just chillin' - enjoying a cheese pizza and learning about Aiode Falls. Many angels and demons have populated the area and even He doesn't know why. Before He investigates or takes any action, He's so going to thrash some hardcore waves, dude.